lpkcarlson's Journey to Health

[lpkcarlson]

Wow,

Well, here I am, 7 1/2 months after starting on SB and just starting a journal.....

I've decided to do this because I'm going to have some major stressors in my life coming soon (in addition to some major stressors in the past year), and I really believe that keeping a journal is going to make me more aware of what I'm doing and it will keep me accountable to myself...I also know that if I need a kick in the butt, I will also receive that from the many wonderful people here...

I'm 38 years young, will be married to my DH for 14 years on Sept 5 (wow...how did that happen), most of that time happily, although I have moments when I just want to say to him "I can't miss you if you won't leave!" We have one daughter, Katie, who will be turning 9 on Halloween.
I started SB at 219, and am currently sitting at 204, and have been for some time. MAJOR stall. However, I'm not overly concerned with this...I know I'm healthier and that it took years to pack on all this weight, so if it takes a year, or two, or three to lose it, then so be it.

Major stressors from the last year:
1. I had a miscarriage a year ago tomorrow...I was 14 weeks along.
2. My husband was in an accident driving a cement truck a year ago this week. He has had one surgery, with another possible surgery facing him in the next month or so...he'll be having an MRI in the next week or so. He's been on disability and unable to work since last August. He has gone back to school to become a massage therapist, but still has a few months to go.
3. We've moved....again
4. I lost a dear family freind in Iraq on June 15. Chad was 19.

Major stressors coming up:
1. Tax season is around the corner (I'm a professional bookkeeper) Most people don't think about their taxes until April 14th at about noon ...tax season begins in November for us.
2. My husband's Auntie (who is also my very good friend) is having major life issues and has to keep me posted. I know as her friend that I should not mind this...but her issues involve other family members & I feel like I'm stuck in the middle.
3. My wonderful MIL, who is a 7 year breast cancer survivor informed us back in early January that she had a tumor in her left armpit. Come to find out this cancer was "Sarcoma" - not sure of the spelling - and that it is a muscle cancer; often caused by....drum roll please....radiation treatments. If the cancer doesn't kill ya, the cure will... She had surgery to remove the tumor, but they couldn't get it all & she will not do chemo again (it nearly killed her, too...she had an allergic reaction to it) and can't see treating a cancer like that with more radiation. Anyway, I've noticed in the past weeks that she seems to be "off". Sure enough, I asked, and she said yes, it's back again. It's moving fast & I think it's in her left lung already, since she is complaining of major shortness of breath. My FIL and husband are not dealing well with this turn of events & I know this is going to fall to me. I honestly don't think she'll make it through the winter.

Bringing me to the point that I am a MAJOR stress eater. I recognize that and try to be cognizant of what I'm putting in my mouth and why, but sometimes that thought falls by the wayside.

Todays menu so far:

B: Kashi GL w/ ff milk & handful blueberries; water
S: handful of carrots
L: Huge salad w/ chicken cubes, crumbled turkey bacon, lf cheese, grape tomatos, cucumbers w/ ranch dressing - also a small Wendy's chili (comfort food for me!); water & small diet coke
S: apple w/ peanut butter
D: Grilled lamb chops w/ grilled veggies & salad or shrimp scampi on spaghetti squash w/ salad; water & maybe a small glass of wine
S: Probably sliced strawberries or peaches with a dollop of cool whip

Okay, there it is.....sorry it's such a book. But, hey, it's my journal, right?

[LyndaB]

(((((((((((((((((((patty)))))))))))))))))))))))

We're here to help... and offer a shoulder... slip you a hanky... and slap you around if you eat what you're not supposed to.

You do seem to have more on your plate than the average Joe/Jane... I'm sorry for that. But you've made a wonderful first step in relieving some of that stress just by writing about what's on your mind.

I do hope all goes well with your husband and everything else hovering around you.

You know what your triggers are and you've admitted them. That's half the battle of taking control over them.

Good luck to you!

[LegalBeagle]

Ditto what LyndaB said. And more hugs.

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{lpkcarlson}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

[lpkcarlson]

Thanks for stopping by LyndaB & LB,

The hugs were much needed & much appreciated. I think yesterday was the "straw that broke the camel's back" & I ended up crying a couple of times. Felt good, but the swollen eyes didn't look too good!

This a.m. was bad, after lying in bed for about 2 hours last night, discussing MIL's health with DH.

Fortunately, I've had a few laughs today, reading some of the posts. Love the "naughty lingere" discussion in your journal, LyndaB!

Have a great evening everyone! See you in the morning!

[lpkcarlson]

Well, crud...there goes the dinner plans.

MIL just called to invite us to dinner & I just don't want to turn down time with her right now.

Fortunately, the mexican place we're going to can be very SB freindly. I'll have the carne asada: grilled skirt steak served with whole pinto beans (with some of their homemade salsa mixed in), sliced tomatoes, a little guacamole & I'll order the side dinner salad with, so I'm sure to get my veggies.

Would love to have one of those margaritas....

No! Iced tea with a lemon wedge, since I have had all my water, I can indulge in an iced tea!

[lpkcarlson]

Good Morning & Happy Thursday!

Didn't get to post for yesterday...ended up going to yet another funeral (way too many of these this summer) at the last minute yesterday morning and was gone most of the day.

Yesterday:
B: Quesadilla w/ green chilis, red pepper & onion on a ww tortilla & coffee w/ ff milk & sf english toffee syrup.
L: Steak salad--probably 3 C. of greens w/ slices of steak & a few blue cheese crumbles & blue cheese dressing
S: handful of grapes
D: Steak w/ steamed veggies, salad & about 1/2 C. beef barley soup. (Can't remember, but we can have barley, right?; I mostly had broth & the veggies)
S: nsa fudgesicle

Today:
B: ww toast w/ melted cheese; about 1/2 c. sliced cukes; coffe w/ ff milk & sf vanilla syrup
S: Probably some strawberries & a cheese stick
L: leftover steak & veggies from last night
S: Apple w/ pb
D: Not sure yet; supposed to be having dinner w/ MIL, but will see what happens; if not, probably that shrimp scampi & spaghetti squash I've been meaning to fix for days now

Well, some fun news. My 1994 chevy lumina has been sitting, undriven, at my in-laws for almost a year because it's transmission is shot & we couldn't afford to have it fixed. I've been trying to sell our '93 Crysler Labaron (to have the money for the new tranny) for about 8 months now, with no success. So, out of the blue, DH calls the guy that fixed the tranny in his pickup about 2 1/2 yrs ago & the guy says "I'll do it for $600 if you pull it, bring it in then put it back in after I'm finished, or $1000 if I do the whole thing" Pretty good, considering the lowest price we had been quoted was $1500 (highest $2800). So then DH says, well, we just don't have the cash, but I would sign the title of my other car over to you if you'll fix this tranny....the guy says Really? So yesterday, after I got back from the funeral, we took the Labaron over for him to see and he takes one look at it & says DEAL! I guess his wife is needing a different car & this is perfect. In addition to fixing the tranny, he's going to fix a bunch of other minor things (that would add up to about another $800-1000 - minor things, mostly labor). The Labaron is only worth about $2000-2400 & we were just given the car, so we're really not out any cash. I like the Labaron okay & it's fun to drive - it's a convertible; but i LOVE my Lumina. I will probably be driving it again about this time next week. The rest of the car, including the engine is in terrific shape. I'm SOOOO excited.

[lpkcarlson]

Happy Friday!

DD & I had dinner w/ my mom & dad last night:

Rotisserie chicken (I took the skin off my chicken breast), huge salad, sliced cucumbers & baked acorn squash. Yum!

We received wonderful news--I guess there was an article in the USA Today Wenesday edition that the Iraqi who may have detonated the bomb that blew up Chad's Humvee and killed him and 4 of his fellow Marines on June 15 has been arrested! I cried when I heard....I think I will take flowers to his grave tomorrow.

DH, DD & I will be having dinner w/ mom & dad & Chad's grandparents tonight. Mom's putting ribs on the grill (a no-no, I know; but this is a CELEBRATION!) and will be getting fresh peaches & cream corn (another no-no, but I'll only have one), tomatos, cukes & squash from the local farmer's market. Yummy!

B: Kashi GL w/ blueberries, ff milk & coffee w/ ff milk & sf vanilla syrup
S: grapes? maybe a pear
L: leftover chicken, salad & squash from last night
S: grapes or pear (whatever I didn't eat for a.m. snack!)
D: beef ribs, corn, salad, squash, sliced tomatoes (I think I'll take some brown rice w/ me, too.)
D: probably some more fruit

Have a wonderful weekend everyone!

[yellobeuty]

hi,

I saw your post in Legals journal and just wanted to come over and say hi.

I'm glad you started a journal it is so uplifting and encourageing to have people stop in and help us out.

your right you can do this even with all the stressors in your life.

have a blessed day!

[lpkcarlson]

YB,

Thanks for stopping by...can always use encouraging words, right?

Have a great day!

[lpkcarlson]

Happy Monday! (as happy as a Monday can be, anyway )

Had a nice weekend & spent some good quality time with MIL. I can tell her health is going downhill so fast. Yesterday, when she & I went to brunch, she had forgotten her purse, so we turned around (we had only gotten a few blocks from the house when she remembered) and I parked right in front of the house so she could go in and grab her purse. By the time she got back to the car, she was completely out of breath. This from a woman who used to do a brisk mile walk and not even break a sweat. It's so sad.

NSV for the weekend: went shopping breifly Saturday evening (DH had to pick up his new black & white checked Vans shoes) and I went in to Coldwater Creek (love that store!) to browse. I saw this beautiful tan/gold/turquoise blouse & fell in love. I've never been able to fit into anything I've tried on there in the past; even the 1X & 2X have never fit quite right. I looked and the largest size they had was a XL (not a 1X, an XL) & I held it up & thought, well, it's pretty close; I'm going to try it on. IT FIT! and it looks sooooo good on me. I got it. I wore it yesterday with a chunky turqoise necklace & some turqoise earrings & felt so sexy! MIL & I went to brunch at a local restaurant and received several rather long stares from several men, and two of them just outright flirted with me while I was waiting in line for my omlette!

Well, DH is home today with DD, who was running a fever last night. She's supposed to go camping for 2 days with my folks, starting tomorrow, so I hope she's feeling better so that she will still be able to go. My parents are retired, so they go camping quite a bit, but will only go during the week (avoiding the crowds), and since DD starts school next Monday, they will have to go this week, or she is going to miss out on the camping trip until next year.

Meals this weekend:

Saturday:
B: ww toast w/ pb, coffee w/ ff milk & sf vanilla syrup
L: I was bad; really just had a few pieces of cheese & some fruit & raw veggies
S: some grapes on the way to the mall
D: chicken (it had been fried, so I just peeled the skin off a breast); kidney beans, cottage cheese, salad

Sunday:
Brunch: 2 egg omelete w/ green chilies, tomatoes, mushrooms, onions & cheese; some taco meat w/ lettuce, tomato, salsa; fruit
S: some carrots & celery dipped in ranch
D: steak, steamed veggies (zuchinni, yellow squash, carrots & french style green beans), salad
S: fudgesicle

[lpkcarlson]

Is it Tuesday already? Good grief!

Took DD to the school this a.m. for her DIBELS testing - a kind of "placement" reading test so that their teacher knows what needs to be worked on this year. I just love her school--she attends a private christian school & I just love that the teachers really do care about the students. Plus, since we all attend church together, we know each other also as family!

Then took DD out to my mom & dad's so they could go on their 2 day camping trip. DD just has to try out the new camper!

DH & I are going to Red Rocks this evening to see the movie Ray with a couple of friends. I think we're going to try to buzz into Morrison for dinner first--would love to go eat on the patio at Tony Rigatoni's--haven't been there for a couple of years.

Had a telephone discussion w/ Auntie last night about MIL's health...I really have been trying to tell her (& DH) for some time now that things weren't good, but they were in denial, I guess. Auntie talked to MIL yesterday afternoon & couldn't believe how weak she sounded. I think reality is sinking in for everyone & it's only going to get harder from here on out. Please pray for my family so that we will all have strength to get through the next several months. We will be having a talk with DD when she gets back from her camping trip...she needs to understand that her MeMe is dying.

Today's menu as best as I can guess:

B: lf vanilla yogurt w/ Kashi GL
S: some grapes; piece of cheese
L: I'll probably go grab a salad--maybe Wendy's (hmmm...chili sounds yummy, too)
S: triskets w/ laughing cow, or apple & pb
D: Dinner out--either a salad or other SB friendly meal

Also did the Power Mile from the Walk off the Pounds DVD---Loved it! I also purchased a Pilates DVD, so I would like to get started on that--maybe tomorrow morning.

[yellobeuty]

you know. your camping story about your daughter going camping with your parents. gave me hope.

one of the things I regret most or have sacrificed most was giving up camping. We haven't had money to do it or time or physical ability(due to dh health issues). and so my kids did not grow up going camping every weekend like I did. I grew up camping, fishing, crabbing, boating, hikeing, etc. but my kids only got to go once or twice. ds went with boyscouts. but, as a family even though we all love it. we have only gone once or twice. my mom get rid of the trailer before I was ready to use it. and as said tent camping was difficult w/health issues. so, it never happened.

but, as I read your posts. I was thinking. hey I can do that. when we are all done with college and we are by ourselves. we can then get a trailer and take my kids and their kids camping. oh what joy! all is not lost.

[lpkcarlson]

Oh look! jumping up & down excitedly YB is here to visit! I'll get out the tea & teacups & we'll have tea & exchange camping stories!

YB,
some of my fondest childhood memories are of camping or just enjoying the Colorado mountains with my family (mom, dad, brother & I). Years ago, when I was about 4 or 5, my dad had an old Chevy van. He did some conversions to it and installed a sink, a stove (propane) and a couple of benches with a table in between that would drop down into a bed. Then he would open up the back doors & attach on the tent, so we had a huge area in which to enjoy ourselves. Even though that camper is long gone and it was so many years ago when I was so young, I will always remember that camper. I have lots of pictures of my younger brother and me in the woods. We weren't rich and he & I are dressed in hand-me-downs, but we are obviously having a great time. My parents did alot of that kind of stuff with us. In the winter, we would head for the hills to cut down our own Christmas tree. Ahhhh...the memories. I just love a trip down memory lane, don't you?

My parents worked hard for years, and are now retired & comfortable financially. They bought a small pop up camper about 20 years ago, but by then I was just graduating from h.s. & in college & it just wasn't "cool" to go camping with your parents. I regret that. I only camped in that camper maybe 3 times in the past 20 years. This spring, after much cojoling (spelling?) from my brother & me, my folks bought a new Hi-Low hydraulic pop up camper & an Expedition to pull it with (we told them, go & enjoy yourselves while you're still young - dad's 65, mom 63 - and in good health. They felt so guilty about "spending our inheritance", but my brother & I both agreed this is what we wanted them to do. They have taken my brother's girls camping a couple of times this summer, but we've been so busy with other committments, that this is the first time DD has had to try out the new "toys". I'm sure they'll have a wonderful time. Maybe we can try to go with them this next time.

Don't lose hope about the camping! It can happen. God does answer prayers, and I'm sure that this is one he will love to answer for you someday!

Thanks again for stopping by & allowing me to "trip down memory lane"!

[yellobeuty]

I have a meeting. but, when I get home I'm stopping buy with a cup of decafe tea and my own memories.

see you then.

[LegalBeagle]

Ohhh. can I play, too? When I was growing up my Dad used to take us camping every summer in Key West. We would snorkel and swim all over the place! We loved the coral reefs! He also took us camping at Disney World one year, and we liked that, as well.