| CarbQueen
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I have an odd question. I live on the corner and my property touches a property where two boys live. I would estimate 10 and 13 years old. They have friends who have repeatedly rode their bikes on my lawn when it is wet and damaged my lawn. They play "chicken" with me when I mow. I have talked to them repeatedly about using my property as a "cut-thru" that it is private property, etc. I started out nice and have escalated my seriousness. The parents of the two boys have seen this behavior, been within feet of it, and have said nothing to their sons and nothing to the other children.
Tonight was the breaking point for me though. There were 8 boys in my driveway, it took me honking, repeatedly for them to move enough for me to get in my garage. I have a fence with a make-shift gate, which they had torn down. And one boy said "that is the b**** that lives here".
I am at a loss. Do I talk to the parents, I only know the set that is adjacent to me (and they were the only ones that take me seriously I feel), I don't even know who the other children are. Do I call the cops for destruction of personal property?
I am the youngest of 7, and I have a VERY large family. If any of us had been so bold to use other people's property, my mother and father would NEVER have let me forget it. I don't understand this thinking now - where is the personal responsibility?
I am looking for any advice. I don't want to anger the neighbors, but I am at my wits end. I feel that the more I let this happen the more it will get worse, especially where it is summer. Help! |
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Mon Jun 11, 2007 10:53 pm |
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| ladybugnessa
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well as a parent, i would say you can ATTEMPT to talk to the parents first and you should.
also i'd explain to them since you don't know the other boys' parents that you will be forced to call the police.
I'd post NO TRESSPASSING signs so that you have legal standing.
I'd WARN the boys after you've posted the signs (and post them INSIDE your windows so they can't tear them down) that you will have to call the police if they can't obey the law. |
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Mon Jun 11, 2007 11:09 pm |
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| boxergurl
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Wow, you sound like me!! Luckily for me, the problem solved itself.... the family moved! I'm sorry that you have to go through this, but I do completely understand how you feel. Our old neighbors had two girls who didn't understand what a property line was. The older girl would sit under our tree with her friends. They'd just sit and stare if we were outside bbq'ing or something. The younger girl was walking by our fence one day (which is about 10 feet from the edge of the property), and our dog went bounding across the yard and jumped against the fence in his boxer fashion, scaring her. She proceeded to poke and prod him with an umbrella from the other side of the fence. They also used to help themselves to our strawberry patch, their friends would skateboard in our driveway, they'd hang out in front of our house ALL day long in the summer making all kinds of noise... oh I could go on and on. I was SO happy the day they moved. We should have said something many times to the parents, but we knew it wouldn't do any good, because the parents obviously didn't care. We NEVER saw the mother, even though she was a stay at home mom. We lived by them for almost 4 years, and saw her about 3 times. The dad worked all the time, and you could tell he did his best to stay away from the kids.
I think you should try talking to the parents, like Nessa said. I wish you good luck.... it sucks having crappy neighbors. Otherwise, I'd just start hoping and praying real hard that they move! :wink: |
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Tue Jun 12, 2007 4:08 am |
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| boxergurl
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| Also wanted to add.... if it were my kids, I'd want to know if they were doing something wrong, and that includes their friends! |
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Tue Jun 12, 2007 4:11 am |
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| justinmeganne
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same as bioxergurl ( pretty avatar by the way :D )
if they were mine i would like to know what they do and make sure it does not offence any neighbour |
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Tue Jun 12, 2007 1:25 pm |
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| A-Rod
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i'd guess this is just as much a problem with the parents as the kids - if they've been within view of their kids doing that and said nothing, chances are they really don't care and probably won't be very sympathetic to your complaints.
i agree with others that your first step should be talking to the parents, and letting the kids know that under no circumstances are they supposed to go on your property. from there, no trespassing signs are good. at that point you've done everything you can do as an individual and if you need to involve the cops, so be it. but i'd just be prepared for the parents to do nothing and perhaps to be a little confrontational if you approach them, and to get even more angry if you involve cops. some people just never grow up. good luck - sounds like a real pain in the butt. |
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Tue Jun 12, 2007 7:05 pm |
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| CarbQueen
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Thank you for all of your comments, they are very appreciated.
I was pretty heated last night when I wrote that - a 13-yo calling me a b**** was not what I was expecting after a long day.
I will talk to the parents again, and put up signs, and go from there.
And I hope that I will have the same experience as boxergurl and they move the heck out! :? |
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Tue Jun 12, 2007 7:23 pm |
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| A-Rod
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just a hippie anecdote but i thought this was interesting ...
according to feng shui tradition, if you place a mirror in your house facing the house of a neighbor you particularly dislike, their negative energy will reflect off the mirror and back toward their own house.
one of my coworkers had really awful nextdoor neighbors and just for fun, did this ... three days later, they moved out suddenly and unexpectedly.
might be worth a try! |
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Tue Jun 12, 2007 8:02 pm |
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| ladybugnessa
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A-Rod wrote: just a hippie anecdote but i thought this was interesting ...
according to feng shui tradition, if you place a mirror in your house facing the house of a neighbor you particularly dislike, their negative energy will reflect off the mirror and back toward their own house.
one of my coworkers had really awful nextdoor neighbors and just for fun, did this ... three days later, they moved out suddenly and unexpectedly.
might be worth a try!
OMG I AM SO DOING THIS!!! |
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Tue Jun 12, 2007 8:04 pm |
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| AleciaBneedstobefreed
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| Life with neighbors. My kids have to be reminded of their manners. They are 7 and 6 so they are still figuring these things out. It's a good idea to NOT let these children in your driveway. It's a liability. I have a neighbor who my kids love to visit and they let them ride bikes up and down their sloped driveway. Lo and behold my oldest dented their garage door. They aren't allowed to ride in the driveway anymore and she was grounded from her bike for being careless (even if it was an accident) Lesson learned. I won't let my children in other people's yards even if they are given permission unless they are playing with children at the home. I won't let other neighbor kids do it either. But I'll share what my Dad did at the home I own now when he had the same problem. He put huge logs in front of their trails they made through the yard. That way they couldn't pass through. |
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Wed Jun 13, 2007 3:14 am |
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| maltby_gardner
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We don't have any neighbors with younger children now, but we do have a mail carrier that pulls up to the mailboxes (which are on our grass parking strip, no curb), then, when pulling away, pulls across our driveway and through the grass strip on the other side, which, of course, made a permanent tire track in the grass. So...we put a very large (DH had to move it with a hand truck) rock right at the corner of the driveway opposite from the mail boxes. She now has to pull back onto the street in the within the width of the driveway. Very effective for blocking unwanted traffic.
Now if only every person in the neighborhood didn't think it was a great place to let their dogs pee... |
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Wed Jun 13, 2007 3:22 pm |
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| justright
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| I don't have any neighbors but I do have 4 kids. I WOULD want to know! I've tried to never be one of those Mom's who thinks their little angels would never do any harm. Never say never! |
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Wed Jun 13, 2007 8:46 pm |
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| mjmjam2002
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| I would want to know. I hope you get it figured out, what brats. |
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Thu Jun 14, 2007 7:36 am |
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| jnmmom
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I agree with justright. I also have 4 kids and would want to know. Most normal people want to keep the peace with neighbors.
If that doesn't work, maybe you could start camping out on their lawn :D
Good luck, from having a couple bad neighbors before, my heart goes out to ya! |
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Thu Jun 21, 2007 4:13 pm |
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| Ph.D. 2 B
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| Can you say water sprinkler :twisted: That is what my mom used to either chase them off or make the ground too wet for them to enjoy. Also the 13 yr old is old enough to know better and this does sound a bit intentional since you have repeatedly said something too them. I'm all for the tresspassing signs but you have to back it up with calling the cops. |
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Mon Jul 16, 2007 3:47 am |
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