| Lady Moonlight
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So...
I'm not on meds for my depression, but I've had it for years. And for years, I've been dealing with it by eating. Now that I'm on SB, I'm finding it extremely difficult to NOT eat when I'm depressed. And also if I eat anyways, I make poor choices.
So, what are some ways that y'all out there deal with your depression besides eating and also exercise.
I've tried exercise, but when I'm depressed, sometimes I get enraged by exercising. I know that doesn't necessarily make sense, but believe me, I do. It's really scary. :shock: :?
Any good ideas?
LM |
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Fri Apr 13, 2007 3:39 am |
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| LegalBeagle
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Why aren't you on meds, if I may ask? Have you talked to a doctor about your depression and rage? I really think you should, especially since you have a young child at home. It probably would make your life SO much easier if you weren't depressed and enraged, you know?
Hugs. I hope you find a solution/some peace of mind. |
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Fri Apr 13, 2007 3:25 pm |
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| Lady Moonlight
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Thanks for your reply. I'm not on meds for a lot of different reasons, some of them personal and some of them, not so much. I've never been officially diagnosed by a pdoc or by any doc, but it's pretty obvious that I've had it for about the last 10 years (I will be 23 this year). I have a lot of problems with mood swings and can go days for feeling great and then a week of feeling like I should just stay in bed. When I was in high school, I had a lot of suicidal thoughts, some of which still hang around in the back of my head. I'm so used to it though. I know that it's not an option, even if my head says it is...
Anyways, I have no interest on being on meds. I know I should at least see a counselor/psychiatrist, but I don't know how much my insurance covers that kind of thing.
At any rate, meds are pricey and I'm terrible at remembering pills. I can barely remember my BC if it's not sitting in plain view in the kitchen. If it is moved, I'll forget for 2-3 days until I find it again. Also, side effects are not fun and sometimes not even worth it. And other more personal reasons...
Mostly, I just avoid my triggers as much as possible. Try to go in another room and take a breath. When I do get really mad, mostly I just cry and try to vent reasonably or go scream in a pillow kind of thing. I do not like being angry around DS. If I am, I'll have DH watch him. I don't get enraged too much.
Anyways, maybe I need to try meditational yoga to relax, or something. I was just curious how other people dealt since eating is not an okay option.
LM |
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Sat Apr 14, 2007 12:36 pm |
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| Peony
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LM, yoga does help, meditation too. I like to crochet and sometimes the repetitive nature of the the movements helps.
Birth control pills can be a hindrance. I know sometimes it is the lesser of two evils, but the pill can increase depression. |
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Mon Apr 16, 2007 10:55 am |
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| Suburbanite
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Just like you, I was depressed for years and didn't want to medicate or do counseling . . . my mom and sister and grandmother were ALL on meds and probably I should have been too . . . but . . . well, I think you understand!
Anyway, you asked about tips for coping. It sounds like you're doing a great job already . . . just being aware of the depression is 8/10 of the battle, I think . . . but for more info some of the best tips and discussions I found were on an Internet search for "cognitive behavioral therapy" (CBT).
Basically CBT consists of saying to the voices in your head, "Thanks for sharing, but you're just an emotion, and I don't have to be ruled by you." But the CBT websites and articles give a lot more details about how to actually DO that. I am really convinced that my CBT reading and self-study helped me climb out of that dark hole so maybe it'll help you too.
FWIW, the SB way of eating has helped me a lot with my psychological health, too. I am now realizing that lot of the depression feelings for years were linked to uneven blood sugar and bad eating habits. I was depressed, so would snack, would eat carbs for the fix, and that would crash my blood sugar even more, and then I'd get more depressed. This went on for about 20 years! Bad stuff.
Last year I got a grip on this problem and went to a high-protein diet that really started to calm my brain, and now the SBD really has completed the correction. I feel totally OK now, 100% of the time, which is amazing.
Um. I also just thought of this - could it be that exercise is driving down your blood sugar and the exercise-anger is a physical reaction to the lower sugar levels? Just a thought.
Sorry to ramble on but your post sounds so familiar that I could have written it myself 10 years ago, so I really am rooting for you! |
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Sun Apr 22, 2007 2:29 am |
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| Lady Moonlight
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Thanks for your replies.
Peony, Yoga is something that appeals to me. I would need to schedule it in, perhaps first thing in the morning or something. I've never thought of crocheting, though my MIL does some. She also knits. I really enjoy reading too. Quiet distracting activities do well with me whereas high intensity exciting stuff doesn't so much (unless you count rollercoasters, but who really wants to eat on a coaster??) I've never been athletic or into sports at all, so perhaps I should look into more quiet hobbies for myself.
Suburbanite, my whole family has been on meds at one point or another. One sister and my mother still are and will be for the rest of their lives. I have never taken meds for depression and don't plan too. I believe that I can find other methods, including seeing a counselor, to deal. I should really look into CBT. I have been aware of my problems for years, but have never truly admitted to myself that something was actually wrong with me. I think over time, some things have gotten better and others worse. Like my triggers have changed. Does that make sense?
As far as the exercising goes, I think it's a cross b/w my bloodsugar and my anxiety levels. The more uptight I am about it, the worse it is. I've tried exercising when I REALLY don't want to, and that's often when I get angry. Or, if the exercise is overwhelming, I get upset easily. For instance, one day, months ago, I tried to run the 2mile course around the neighborhood while pushing my DS in the stroller. Halfway through, I was so angry I couldn't concentrate on my breathing and ended up pooping out. Just sobbed the rest of the way home. I don't know if my sugar was low, but my anxiety was definitely up. I appreciate your thoughts though, and I think I'll try to make notes of any major occurrences to find a pattern. I so rarely get that angry anymore, esp. since the postpartum depression finally lifted and I'm left with the regular stuff I'm used to.
Thanks!
LM |
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Mon Apr 23, 2007 2:20 am |
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| <3.Nikki.<3
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I am bipolar and I deal with it through meditation.. sometimes I get flare-ups, and I'm one of the lucky ones who doesn't have random suicidal episodes (last one was when I was 13!).
I basically sit down and meditate somewhere quiet, just work on making my mind quiet and then walking myself mentally to a place I've made up just to make me feel better.. I had a therapist teach me how to do it and it really makes me calm down.
When I can't meditate I concentrate on breathing and do mental mantras, I've also learned that it's okay to remove yourself from a situation to calm down when you feel really stressed out/upset!
Changing your diet DOES help a lot.. when I was young my mother chose to take me off the meds which made me sick and change our family's diet to help regulate everything.. at first it was rough but after I got through my sweets cravings I felt so much better and at peace.
It's okay if you need medication though, just take it slow and have someone other than yourself keep an eye out just in case. Even I have an emergency prescription in case something bad were to happen (Wellbutrin). Keep looking and good luck, hon! |
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Tue Apr 24, 2007 8:31 am |
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| Lady Moonlight
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The best way I handle myself is to leave the situation and go in another room or drop the conversation and just move on to something else. In a way, it lets go, but I also tend to store some of the anger/hurt/frustration/sadness. When I'm having a hard time, I love to eat, but now I have to learn to move past the food. I'm always wondering how soon I get to eat, even if I'm not hungry. Part of that is probably because having a meal is the most relaxing times of the day. I love just taking a break from everything I'm doing to eat and feel a bit less stressed. I think finding other de-stressors would be good, such as meditation. That way, I won't see food as calming so much.
At any rate, thanks for the imput. If I ever get out of hand again, I'll definitely think about getting some medication. I just know that if/when I do, I'll probably never be off of it. Depression runs in my family. :cry:
LM |
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Fri Apr 27, 2007 2:40 am |
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| A-Rod
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meds are a tough roller coaster of their own ... my sister is bipolar and it has been an interesting journey for her.
she got relief from the meds but they made her feel awful at the same time. through a combination of medication and therapy, she chose to wean herself off of the drugs and has done much better since making the conscious choice to take control of her life/thoughts/behavior and do the work herself instead of letting the drugs do it for her [without the awful side effects].
you might look into what psychological services your insurance covers - having someone to talk to and start to work through these issues with will certainly offer you some grounding and a feeling of forward progress, rather than being lost with all of this and having to deal with it yourself. it sounds like you've developed some wonderful strategies for coping that don't involve food; having a professional to help you utilize those most effectively would be great, i think.
good luck to you - i know this cannot be easy. |
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Tue May 01, 2007 11:23 pm |
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